Beginnings

It all starts somewhere. Today, as I unveil a new blog, I think about why I began writing in the first place. I remember my first poem being published in a little anthology many years ago, a work of pride to a school aged girl. From the time I was small, I had a passion for journalling my thoughts, dreams, and fears; and that passion for writing has followed me through many years, triumphs, trials, and tribulations.

When I gave birth to my first child, my beautiful boy, Ryder, I had no idea how much he was about to change my life. I could never have foreseen the lessons that one tiny human was about to teach me. Though so very loved myself, I didn’t truly understand the power of a mother’s love until I experienced it firsthand.

When our little boy began to face big challenges, we might have collapsed. We might have fallen to our knees, weighed down by fear and sadness. But we could not, so we did not. We dug in our heels and we began again; we began our journey into our new normal. We learned about Global Developmental Delay, failure to thrive, and feeding tubes. We learned about early intervention therapy, orthotics, and mobility devices for toddlers. We learned about Autism, and Sensory Processing Disorder. We learned about Speech Language Pathology, Occupational Therapy, Physiotherapy, Neurology, and Gastroenterology. We learned where to find Starbucks coffee in the children’s hospital, and we learned that it never gets easier waiting for test results, or for your child to come out of a surgical procedure. We learned that we were beyond blessed to have our child to tuck in at night, no matter how difficult our day had been. And we learned that, above all, we had been given the most precious gift: our incredible, complex, kind, resilient, son.

Our life has been far from simple, but we have learned to try to make it as simple as we can. We have learned to slow things down, and enjoy the smallest things in life. We leave the dishes in the sink and the laundry piled on our bedroom floor, and step outside when the sun is shining bright. We celebrate every victory like we’ve won the Nobel prize. We cherish the fact that, despite the mountains we’ve had to move, we are able to sit back and enjoy the view.

And yes, there have been many, many trying times. There has been heartache and despair, and there may be more today or tomorrow. But there has also been happiness, so much happiness, which only continues to grow. As I sit here today, now the mother of two amazing children, I am thankful. I am grateful for the life I have been given: for the family I love so dearly, the friends who are like family themselves, and the opportunities that I may never have had if I hadn’t walked this path.